One day there was a bee and his name was barry he was a good bee. One day he wanted a job at the hive. But he wanted to go out of the hive. So he snack out and got into a group of bees. Then the went back to the hive but barry didn't so he stated out. Then a raindrop hit barry. He said “what was that” then a big storm came so he flo into a window. The storm grow bigger and bigger thunder and lighting. So he stayed the night. But only for a few minutes because in the house a man was allergic to bees. So he tried to kill him. But luckily he got out of the window. So barrey trid to get back to his hive then another raindrop hit him and landed at another house. This time no one was her. But then the door knob twisted and barry sare the door open. A little lady came in andOne sore barry hurt with water. So the little lady went and put barry in a barbie dream house. But Barry fell asleep then morning came and Barry wock up. Then his friend Binsen ranh him and said “Barry were you” and Barry said”I'm out with the humas. Binsen said “what are you doing out of the hive” barry said “i came out with the other bees. Binsen said “wi” barry said “because o im getting a cale by”. Then the little lady was gone, Barry said “where is she?”.
good job Kupa
ReplyDeleteHi Kupa your story is surprisingly like the bee movie but more interesting the bee movie I really like how you are putting the story in parts not in a big story Next time maybe you should tell more about the little lady and what her name is and how Barry`s dealt with his life
ReplyDeleteHi Kupa. l’m Kasey I like the way you introduced your story as 'this is my version of the bee movie'. I was interested straight away. I like your version of the bee movie better then the real movie. I really hope you make a part 2. I really enjoyed it.
ReplyDeleteHi Kupa! I like how you have told the story. I have seen the Bee Movie! I think it is quite a cool movie. You could maybe go back and check your punctuation and spelling but otherwise good story!
ReplyDeleteHi kupa its Tumoana this is a good story based on a movie but your own version.excited to read part 2 keep up the good work.Its cool how you can make a story about a bee thats based on a movie and come up with you own idea.
ReplyDeleteHi kupa
ReplyDeleteI like your story it is fun to read and it is also Creative.This story reminds me of the time i got stung by a bee.Try add some information